Thanks to all of you for your emails and phone calls asking about my job situation. I got two precious phone calls today!! At this point, I have not heard anything from the hospital in Rome, but the head hunter did call and leave me a message yesterday afternoon. I didn’t call him back simply because his message said that he was just “touching base” and it didn’t sound as though he knew anything at that point. He said he would be talking to the hospital today. I don’t expect to hear anything this week simply because of the holidays. I knew that the CFO was out last week and I think they were interviewing another candidate this week. My friend in Las Vegas sent me an email last week letting me know that there was a position open at the HUGE HCA hospital there. I told her that I just couldn’t go to Vegas. I told another friend today that things have seemed to have gotten better since I came back from Rome. I got a nice note from my boss yesterday thanking me for my help on the annual budget, and although I am grateful for her appreciation, I look at it like I was just doing my job. I don’t need nice notes or new furniture (which I got, too). I have to get up every single morning and say a quick prayer (before Alise gets up!) about my attitude and for God to change my heart concerning my job. I want to find my joy again and I know that I let my circumstances and things that happen rob me of that joy. It’s a struggle everyday and I have to keep reminding myself to quit telling myself that “I’m not happy” or “So-and-so just ticks me off.” Instead, I’m reminding myself how fortunate I am to have a job to go to. So that’s where things stand right now.
A storm came through at 3:15 this morning and Alise woke up. I remember when she was a tiny baby and I was on maternity leave. In the afternoons, there would be a few thunderstorms and she would just sleep right through it. She always has, but last night, for the first time, she woke up and she was scared. I got her while Wayne booted down the computers and put her in bed with us. I thought she had gone back to sleep, but she laid snuggled up to me in the bed, completely still, and watched the lightening as it flashed in the windows. Now, as I write this, I’m beginning to wonder if last night was the first time she had ever seen lightening. Can you imagine what was going through her little mind? After the storm subsided a little, she became restless and booted her daddy out of the bed. It was so funny! When Wayne got up out of the bed, she said, “Daddy, couch?” She knew! We were both laughing at 4:00 this morning! She finally went back to sleep and despite loosing about an hour of sleep, she got up in the best mood!
Grandma Ruth use to call Chad “velcro” when he was younger because he liked to stay close to Donna. Lately, Wayne has been making the same remarks to me, referring to Alise (I told him that if he ever called her “velcro,” I would kill him!). I told one of her teachers this morning, that I feel like we have reverted back to the “mommie withdrawals.” Alise went through this phase when she was about 8 months old and it drove me crazy. But the truth is, I can’t even go to the bathroom! She’ll talk and talk about Daddy all the way home, but when Wayne walks through the door, she won’t have anything to do with him. She cries in the morning when I leave her at school—she use to turn around, wave, and say, “Bye-bye, Mommie!” And, now that I think about it, I think all this started after we got rid of the passy. Yep, I really think it did. I love her to death, but I really hope that this is just a phase. She won’t even go to her Sunday School class anymore! Sometimes, I just need some space and then I feel guilty about feeling that way. The guilt of a mother just never ends.
I’m sick of hearing Cinderella sing, “A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes.” I’m sick of hearing the mice sing whatever it is that they sing, and I’m tired of “Bippity-Boppity-Boo!” I never thought I’d be saying those words. After all, Cinderella is my favorite fairy tale and Walt Disney movie. HOWEVER (and that’s a BIG however), when those are the only three songs that you play over and over and over and over and over (did I say over?) again, I could just about throw up! I bought Alise a princess CD way back when and I pulled it out the other day and now all she wants to hear is “Cinderella” on the way to and from school everyday. I told her Cinderella was still asleep this morning and put another CD in. She wasn’t too happy, but she got over it!
We took goody bags to a few of her friends at school today. We finished stuffing them last night. I had been talking it up for a few days about her getting to put the bags in her friends’ cubbies (lockers) as a “surprise.” But after the fit she through this morning (She wouldn’t even wish Ms. Sandy a Happy Birthday!), I ended up putting the bags in the lockers myself.
Oh! Let me tell you about this! My friend, Leigh, just got back from a trip to New York with one of her son’s class. She bought me a Coach purse!! Actually, I found out about it Saturday night when Amie text messaged me (right in the middle of my spinach and artichoke appetizer) that Leigh had called and found one. It’s not an authentic Coach purse, but it is “Coach” enough for me! Leigh got herself a Kate Spade purse. Both purses came from China Town. Leigh was telling me all about their trip and the Broadway play of the “Lion King” and she told me that I just had to go before I die! So, I got to thinking….New York sounds like a fun town to go to for our anniversary! So I called my wonderful husband and said, “Honey,….?” I mean, I found a deal for both of us that was less than $1,000! He said, “Well, if you want a Coach purse, I know where to go in Dallas.” Okay, first of all, I already have a new Coach purse. Why would I want another one? Second of all, what does Dallas have to do with New York? It’s completely in the opposite direction! Men! So needless to say, I think the New York trip is out (Leigh, maybe we could do a “girls trip” one year and go?)!
I’m still waiting with baited breath for the one package of Alise’s birthday invitations to come in. Did I tell you they were coming from Canada? Of course, I chose the slowest shipping, but my goodness! The reason I am really wanting to see the invitations is because I finally found some cupcake invitations at the dollar store and they are really cute. They even have polka dots on the icing of the cupcake! So, of course, I’m thinking I wanna go with the cheaper invitations, but I also want them to look nice. The dollar store didn’t have matching plates and napkins and all that, but they did have the matching thank you notes. I would have to buy solid color plates and napkins.
I caught Alise saying, “Oh my gosh” this morning and I tried to nip that in the bud before it even got started! Obviously, Wayne had dirt on his shoes this morning because there was some on the floor. Alise saw it and pointed to it and said, “Oh my gosh.” I’m trying to think if I even say that? I said, “Alise, we don’t say that. You say ‘good gracious’ instead.” She said, “Good gracious” only it didn’t sound as clear as “Oh my gosh.”
I feel bad about not thinking about using some of the snapshots of Alise from this weekend at the Gardens for Easter cards for everyone. A friend from work picked up her granddaughter’s pictures from Olan Mills at lunch and they had ordered some Easter cards with her picture on it with a border and eggs. Wayne says we should just get online at walmart.com and see if maybe we can order and have them printed that way. He can pick them up on his route. I’m going to look into it. My friend says that I should just go to Olan Mills, but I will be having Alise’s two year old picture professionally done in about another month, so I hate to spend the money now.
I’m still debating about what to do as far as vacation time for the holidays. Alise’s daycare is closed Friday and Monday. I had planned to take off on Monday to keep her because my mother had plans for that day, but was going to keep her on Friday while I worked. The closer Friday gets here, the more I dread going in on Friday. After all, it is Easter! I was thinking she and I could meet Wayne for lunch in Winnsboro and she could see “daddy’s truck.” Every time she sees a UPS truck, she says, “daddy’s truck.” Speaking of Wayne and UPS, he starts his new route on Monday. He is transferring to the Tallulah route.