Monday, June 19, 2006

Monday, June 19, 2006

I am a horrible mother! God is using my daughter to teach me patience and it's not coming easily. Tonight was gymnastics. It was our second night at "Diaper Daredevils." Alise did better, but she still isn't up with the other kids. She still did alot of running around and playing in the "fort playhouse", but she did spend some time watching the other kids do their "tricks." The closest she got to anything was trying to climb onto the trampoline platform, but every time I tried to pick her up to put her on it, she'd scream. She obviously didn't want me around. I came away tonight disappointed again because she wasn't doing what the other kids were doing. I had to remind myself of several things. First of all, she's only a year old. She's the smallest one in her class...most of the other kids are at least a year and a half. Secondly, she's still getting exercise and running around. Thirdly, I remembered telling myself that I was probably wasting my money and that she wouldn't cooperate anyway. So why am I surprised? It's the expectation. The expectation that she should be doing what all the other kids do. So I "punished" her by not letting her in the ball pit with the others. She had to stand behind and watch. Then I felt guilty because when I was asked why I wouldn't let Alise in with the others, I said, "Well, she's just not doing what she should be doing." Then Tiffany tells me how Addison talked all week about "the balls" and another mom said, "Yeah, I thought about not letting my daughter in, but they've got to have some fun." We got our "tweety bird" sticker, our bag, said goodbye to Addison and left. I just wanted to crawl under a rock some where and die!

And then we had a meltdown on the way home and I spatted Alise's hand when she threw goldfish everywhere (pitching a miniture fit) in her high chair tonight. She was tired and hungry and so was I, but by that time, I had had it.

I bought Alise a lawn mower like her cousin Brooklyn had. I got it at Wal-mart today for $3.97! Uncle Steve would be so proud!!! I'll have to get a picture of her with it. When I picked her up from the daycare, she saw it in the backseat and started reaching for it. Wayne and I had to coax her away from it tonight to get her in the bathtub!

1 comment:

  1. $3.97? Wow! You're talkin my language there!

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